For this child, we have prayed...
When we first got married we
made a promise to one another to let God do the planning. Everyone had a
suggested time frame to conceive said baby... Based upon when our niece became
a "big girl" so we didn't have two babies in the family, some suggested
we travel a lot before we had children... My parents suggested we took a lot of
naps because they don't come back... I remember hearing from a dear friend “children
are miracles, but once they're here you can’t give them back... and if that's
not encouraging, I don’t know what is.
In the same breath, we know people who suffered for 7+ years to conceive... And we didn't want the journey to be (we waited until time was right and now we regret not trying sooner because maybe... we missed our chance? We've both worked with children... Between the two of us, we've babysat for 10 years, worked in two preschools, been a YMCA summer camp counselor, and a boy’s group home assistant family teacher. Clearly, a lot of exposure to children, some may even suggest we wouldn't need or want children after that... But we've always felt it.
We've always felt the calling to be parents, and or adopt. It has always been a desire of ours to have a big family of at least 2... Then in the last year I encouraged our desires to 3 potentially grow to 3 kiddos.
So, we weren't planning for a baby, or preventing... if God was to hand us a child we would be thankful for a long time answered prayer.
A few months discouragingly went by, then we found it silly to play the pity party game because we weren't officially trying, you never know how hard it is to not have a child until you wish you did... I get it now.
We scheduled an appointment in January to be seen by my obstetrician's gynecological health advisor, he promised us to determine what was going on and try to get my body back on track so if we were to conceive a child, we could maintain a pregnancy ... hold on to the following words I tell you... we were told our progesterone levels are too low... that also means; Mood changes, anxiety, irritability, headaches, hot flashes, low sex drive, irregular periods, PMS, breast tenderness, and weight gain are all indications that there is too much estrogen in the body in relation to progesterone levels. while... almost none of the above occurred, I'd missed my period for over 3 months and consistently been met with the same negative every time we tested.
It's hard being patient and putting plans in God's hands with blind faith... this comes with a huge amount of trust for an unknowing amount of time for something that comes so easy to some and as such a trial for others... I'll never forget how I felt in those moments, and if you're reading this and it took longer than we did to bring a baby into your life and the options were adoption, surrogacy, fertility clinic visits hormone therapy, family practice doctors, etc. I commend you.
We told God, this entire situation is in your hands and we promise to praise you either way...
I distinctly remember one night after we found out newlywed friends of ours were pregnant and we weren't... my prayer was "God, if you want to give us a child to Shepard here on earth until you're ready to bring them home, I'm willing to be the best mother I can be... but I promise until that time comes... I will remain faithful and good as a servant of yours because you hold our every moment from here until our last days..." and that was it, I knew in my heart, if it was to happen... he knew where I stood, it was then my job as a Christ follower to not allow pride or hope to get in the way of my faith.
In the same breath, we know people who suffered for 7+ years to conceive... And we didn't want the journey to be (we waited until time was right and now we regret not trying sooner because maybe... we missed our chance? We've both worked with children... Between the two of us, we've babysat for 10 years, worked in two preschools, been a YMCA summer camp counselor, and a boy’s group home assistant family teacher. Clearly, a lot of exposure to children, some may even suggest we wouldn't need or want children after that... But we've always felt it.
We've always felt the calling to be parents, and or adopt. It has always been a desire of ours to have a big family of at least 2... Then in the last year I encouraged our desires to 3 potentially grow to 3 kiddos.
So, we weren't planning for a baby, or preventing... if God was to hand us a child we would be thankful for a long time answered prayer.
A few months discouragingly went by, then we found it silly to play the pity party game because we weren't officially trying, you never know how hard it is to not have a child until you wish you did... I get it now.
We scheduled an appointment in January to be seen by my obstetrician's gynecological health advisor, he promised us to determine what was going on and try to get my body back on track so if we were to conceive a child, we could maintain a pregnancy ... hold on to the following words I tell you... we were told our progesterone levels are too low... that also means; Mood changes, anxiety, irritability, headaches, hot flashes, low sex drive, irregular periods, PMS, breast tenderness, and weight gain are all indications that there is too much estrogen in the body in relation to progesterone levels. while... almost none of the above occurred, I'd missed my period for over 3 months and consistently been met with the same negative every time we tested.
It's hard being patient and putting plans in God's hands with blind faith... this comes with a huge amount of trust for an unknowing amount of time for something that comes so easy to some and as such a trial for others... I'll never forget how I felt in those moments, and if you're reading this and it took longer than we did to bring a baby into your life and the options were adoption, surrogacy, fertility clinic visits hormone therapy, family practice doctors, etc. I commend you.
We told God, this entire situation is in your hands and we promise to praise you either way...
I distinctly remember one night after we found out newlywed friends of ours were pregnant and we weren't... my prayer was "God, if you want to give us a child to Shepard here on earth until you're ready to bring them home, I'm willing to be the best mother I can be... but I promise until that time comes... I will remain faithful and good as a servant of yours because you hold our every moment from here until our last days..." and that was it, I knew in my heart, if it was to happen... he knew where I stood, it was then my job as a Christ follower to not allow pride or hope to get in the way of my faith.
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