Happy Anniversary...How we saved our future marriage, before we were even engaged

By -
Today is our... 15 Month anniversary, (whoot) I figure I'll share some secrets to our success, because it wasn't easy... we admitted we needed help, and if you seek, you will find!

preface... Drew and I have an incredible church family, we speak and arrange meetings with our pastoral staff, WEEKLY and when I say that, every staff member at our church knows us by name, face, and memory and we seek advice from them and they have wrapped their arms around us in more ways than we could ever express, we literally have found a church that we consider god sent... we looked around for this closeness... it wasn't found in our average groups of friends from adolescence, or our jobs... even our neighborhoods... we found this love at Grace Point, and as long as we live in this city... we will never leave.
(nope, I never get sick of talking about our church... ever)

If you are; dating anyone seriously, ever have considered being married, are happily or unhappily married, have friends who are or fall in the categories, look forward to being married... want a marriage that lasts.... let me give you some insight as to what steps of precaution drew and I have been taking on our journey as Christians to strengthen our relationship years before we take the public leap of marriage, the permanent covenant:
You can actually see Drew and I in the picture! 

The Velvet Awakening : A Church Retreat

Drew and I were invited from a co-volunteer at the Grief center we volunteer at to visit his church. His church is a good 45 minutes from our homes though they host Monday night services, we always use it as such a great date night, It gives us another opportunity for church and great conversation afterwards. We went in a very serious time in our relationship, as we were growing in our faith, Drew discovered new things about himself in a very short amount of time and on our first trip to VERVE church, Our home is and always will be Grace Point, but any church that delivers the gospel Monday nights when we’re available… We’re there! we enjoyed it so much, we decided the wonderful retreat they spoke of, we’d attend.

This video is an explanation of what the retreat was all about... 



This retreat changed our lives just as it claimed it would. We went on our Anniversary, yes… that’s the truth. The morning after drew’s 21st birthday, on our One year anniversary, we woke up at 7am, got dressed and grabbed Starbucks and drove clear across the highway to this church. The message was delivered by an amazing pastor from a church called K2 located in Salt Lake City, Utah. His name was Dave Nelson and he literally spoke on our hearts on how we can learn to accept the good and the bad, when the tire swings towards the bad and ugly cold hearted days, and the fun and loving warm fuzzy days… and how to deal with our sins and struggles as humans and student’s of the word. So motivating… we literally confessed the world to one another at lunch after this retreat, I’d recommend it to anyone in Vegas or otherwise if it ever came to your city.

 

Going All the Way: Preparing for a Marriage That Goes the Distance-

 Craig Groeshel

We stumbled upon this book at our resources table at church. It’s such a good book about how you need to put God first in any relationship or you won’t go far at all. Placing your dreams, trust, fears, worries, hard times, good times, happy moments, and excitement in his hands and allowing him to steer your ship and guide your stability. This book has taught drew and I a multitude of things. It shows many examples of what can and will often go wrong in relationships without the presence of God, and gives multiple personal stories from Craig’s personal life to explain to us as readers that we all make mistakes, we all are sinners, we all have room for improvement and this alone was the key reason as to why we loved to book so much. Not only did it open doors for conversation though it helped us to understand the meaning of true and unconditional love with obedience… and though we’ve been on the right path… this book set the guidelines and the tone for our future. We loved it!

iMarriage DVD Study : Andy Stanley
The best so far, was recently recommended by two of our very close friends at church. Their names are Derek and Aubrey. They were recently married in November of 2011, and they dated others prior to finding and falling for one another. Our Pastor likes to make a reference of a train of life… and on the train’s journey you should always have couples ahead of you on the journey to look up to and couples behind you of which you nurture and pull along to stay on the tracks… I believe Aubrey and Derek pull us along and we believe they’re ahead of us! They allowed us to borrow the dvd study called iMarriage from Northpointchurch in Atlanta.  We borrowed this dvd with the condition that when we finished the series, the four of us would go out to dinner and converse about it...and continue to grow together. Andy Stanley does such an amazing job of teaching men and women married or non-married, soon to be newlyweds or oldlyweds, how to love and honor your marriage for what it is… how to remember where your priorities lie and to appreciate your partner or spouse unconditionally regardless of what goes  on in your marriage or relationship. How to manage your desires so they do not become expectations and how to grow in your love for your spouse as God’s love grows for us… it literally was such a large eye opener for Drew and I… we were so appreciative of this message. This dvd series was so rewarding, Aubrey also recommended that we watch "Staying in Love: Falling in Love Is Easy, Staying in Love Requires a Plan." she said you can watch it online for free (<complete parts 1-4 you are welcome!) or buy it as well, we’ll be purchasing the DVD’s soon so we can also share them with friends and pay it forward as they did for us. I am so thankful to have loving friends ahead of us on the journey, to help us remember we are not alone.


I am so thankful I have a wonderful man in my life willing to walk along the hard stuff to appreciate all of the good stuff… our relationship was turning into an M&M... candy coated on the outside… but unpredictable (with all of the new flavors) and sweet on the inside… now it’s more of a traditional piece of chocolate… not sugar coated, not always perfect, sometimes melted, warped, or nutty, but completely appreciated, loved, and enjoyed.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Your ninth birthday

By -
  Audrey, Audrey, Audrey. You are hilarious, beautiful, witty, intelligent, and passionate. You are so much fun. Today you’re 9 years old. A coworker stopped me and said, “I’m so happy you’ll spend the day with her tomorrow because when she’s 18, she won’t want to spend her whole birthday with you.” And that’s so true. I’ll have to share my time. This is your last single-digit birthday. You lost a tooth this week, and it wasn’t even a big conversation. You just lost it. When it comes to looks, Utah gave you freckles—they’re all over. Your eyes are still a hazy green, and your golden locks are growing browner by the day. You still have beautiful streaks of blonde, and I love them. You’re very tall but still in a booster seat. Maybe you’ll outgrow it by 10. I’m proud of you for letting me keep you safe. You started 3rd grade at an incredibly conservative Christian school that didn’t require anyone to follow biblical values except you—so we left. You joined your first charter school, ...
Read more

Your 2nd Birthday

By -
Image
  Bryer boy, Bryer boy. I cannot believe you are two. I will never forget the night I went into labor with you. I went to the hospital around 10 or 11 o’clock at night on the 23rd. I remember thinking, I can’t believe he’s doing this to me. Your dad said you could come any day, and of course, you chose a day that will forever confuse me when it comes to your birthday and your actual birth date. But that’s just like you, full of surprises. And in these last 365 days, you’ve continued to surprise me in the best ways. I’m not shocked one bit. You are everything I didn’t know I needed, and someone I absolutely adore. You are completely obsessed with both of your parents. Audrey? That love is a little more conditional, but you love your whole family big: extended, chosen, and blood-related. You love to play and will play with anyone willing to join you. You spent most of the year reading books. Your favorite was Penelope on the Farm, a hand-me-down from your cousins Nick and Rylee. You ...
Read more

Your eighth birthday

By -
  Audrey Kaydence. Today you are 8 years old. Holy cow kid. You made it to 8. Time goes faster than what I would deem appropriate but all in all you have had quite some LIFE in your years. Let’s recap the last year shall we?  You switched schools in February, which was a challenging decision, but a good one you were at a much smaller school now with a much smaller network of friends and it is healthier for you.  Your blonde hair is still blonde and your eyes are still this gray blue green. They change all the time primarily gray and green sometimes blue and green still very light still very curly. You have more freckles now than you ever have before and I am admiring watching your face with glasses as I know that contacts are coming soon to help with your myopia. You will always be my baby. I am excited to watch you grow up. You got to go to your first concert this year it almost became your entire personality. You have been a Taylor Swift fan since you were about two yea...
Read more